Saturday, February 21, 2009

past and present

In 1994 I hit a guy on a bicycle, sadly he died. He had a dog with him; they were both DOA. It was an apparent suicide. he almost took me with him, damaging some nerves in my neck, which left me some-what paralized and in deep physical and emotional pain. I felt so sorry for myself, I felt sorry for him and his dog too, but mostly felt sorry for myself. Ive been an avid athlete and rock climber most of my life and now I couln't do jack, why me,wa wa wa? I thought I was stong and could recover but the re-occuring nightmarish dreams and the pain haunted me nearly every night; I dreaded going to sleep. I did some drugs, fought with my beloved wife, and ignored my kids. I got caught with a small of drugs. I pleaded guilty because I was guilty! I did some days in jail and then successfully completed three years probation. However, I lost my wife and children in the chaos; I had hit rock bottom. One day I tripped over a small pocket bible, picked it up and started reading, before I new it I was most of the way through the book of John and asking to be baptized. I turned to our best buddy Jesus; he has never let me down although I still had much work to do in my own life; I still had issues! I started counseling for my bad dreams of the accident and drug and alchohol use. I completed that as well. Before too long the dreams subsided and I got my health back, then I re-united with my wife and children. We were devorced by then but we fought with all our will and with the grace of God and our family's blessing we were re-married on 1/1/08. I've gotton a few traffic tickets since then but went on to coach wrestling for some years and to also compete in the same tournaments that my boys wrestled in. Until recently coaching was one of the great joys of my life. The point is that if a man is really willing to put the work in he can overcome many things; the most important thing though is to keep your faith; being of strong faith gives all the armor of God and there is much hope in knowing that. Some said I couldn't ride accross America on a bicycle, then I did. Thanks to all those who have offered an olive branch or a hand shake to me; it means alot.

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